From a person that has struggled to love herself all her life, I know how cliché and honestly, unhelpful it is to hear an always smiling, self-proclaimed life motivator yelling through a screen “You are beautiful! Love yourself!” You’ll have a big smile on your face with this rush of confidence and a new and improved, “you can’t tell me nothing” attitude. Resulting in a person who actually feels on top of the world for about one hour until it’s time to step out into the real world.
I know what it feels like to go out, obsessing about what others might be thinking about you. I know what it feels like to get compliments daily, while looking in the mirror at the end of the night and not believing a thing they’ve said. Sometimes I would wish that I could see what others saw in me because I couldn’t imagine seeing anything other than what I saw in myself.
I was always afraid to admit that I had these insecurities. I was scared that I would look weak and pathetic, or like I would be crying for attention and fishing for compliments.
What I ultimately wanted was self-confidence and the ability to not care about what anyone else thought of me or my decisions. So I did my research. And what I found was a YouTube video of a woman saying all she did was looked in the mirror every single day and said, “I love myself.”
So I did it. Every day I would look myself in the eyes saying that I was beautiful. That I was the sh*t! And even if I didn’t believe it just yet, I walked out the room with my head held high thinking, “I am beautiful.”
Eventually I started viewing myself in a different light. I no longer saw myself through the lens of society. The Kardashian, makeup, implant society.
I started seeing myself through a pure lens. The natural Lisa Bonet lens. That, “this is me with no makeup, flaws and all” type of lens.
And I believed it. I still do. It’s not a temporary, false self-confidence. I am beautiful, and you are too.
xo, Brittany Kayla